12.15.2009

I Have a Friend Now, Okay?!

I have been spending so much more time with Jess these days and it's been wonderful!

I have been so used to just spending time alone while Kyle is at school. I felt like a hermit in my bedroom, constantly. Last year was so hard; I don't think I was ready for it at all. Everybody left and I was stuck at home, at the time living with my mom which made things worse. I revolved my life around phone calls from Kyle and used to get overly upset when I couldn't talk to him. I was admittedly jealous that he got to go off to school and meet new people and go to parties and such, while I was stuck at home feeling miserable on a daily basis. This was no good at all since it would cause tension and result in unnecessary fights.

I feel like after I left my mother's house and let go of a lot of that stress in my life, things have been so much easier. I have been much more happier and so much more comfortable with Kyle being gone so much. But I still spent so much time alone. I've been so used to this that I forgot what it was like to have a real friend.

These past few weeks I have hung out with Jess tons and it feels so great to have another person to see and talk to regularly. Instead of being stuck at home and alone, waiting for Kyle to call me, I can now go out and not feel like such a loser in my room. And Jess is one of the most genuine, nicest girls I have ever known. I absolutely love hanging out with her, and it's a shame that it took so long for us to get closer.

Tonight, we went to Huntington. It was drizzling outside and a little chilly. And very dark. But with the aid of a flashlight and some bravery, we walked down to the beach and onto the boardwalk feeling like champs. It wasn't until on the way back that we lost our brave faces. The flashlight shown on a weird looking figure (a fallen garbage can) and I said "Is that a hunched over body?!" and she literally bolted for the stairs. I am laughing out loud right now just talking about it. So I ran after her because, although I knew it wasn't a body, the sound of her voice was so petrified that I couldn't help but be scared. So there we were running, laughing, and trying not to pee our pants from fear of the "hunched over body". I'm glad nobody else was around to see that. Although it was highly amusing. What an adrenaline rush.

And we went to Sonic for the first time! We didn't know how to order at first, but she figured it out. And then we had no clue if we were supposed to tip the lady who brought out our smoothies, so we just didn't!

It has been such a great couple of weeks lately. And I think I just owe it to Jess for bringing a little bit more happiness into my life these days. Life is good. :)

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