Back to Reality

Home again and school in the morning. Not looking forward to that. Especially after such a great weekend. I love visiting Kyle and being able to just spend all day and night with him. It's my absolute favorite to wake up in the morning with him pulling me closer to him. :) We never go out or do anything special, just hang out in his room with the television on, fooling around. And it makes me so happy! I go to bed with a smile and wake up smiling. It's such a great feeling. I feel so lucky to have him in my life. I don't know how or why it happened, but he's the best, most amazing person in my life and I have no idea how I would have even gotten through the past couple years without him. I love how just thinking about him makes me feel.

Lovelovelovelove it! <3

Pierced!

I went with Jess so she could get her tragus pierced anddddd I got my nose done! I've wanted a little stud on my nose since I got my belly button done years ago, but have been too scared. She gave me the push I needed, and it looks great! Yayayay! Then we ate pizza and mac and cheese and saw The Lovely Bones. I wasn't too impressed with the movie. I expected something much better for some reason. But it's okay. It was still a fun night with my favorite! :)

Until I called Mr. Kyle. Who seemed to just be in a crabby mood. Or maybe just quiet. And didn't talk. And after 25 minutes said he wanted to go play video games with his room mate and complained about how I took forever to call him. :( Oh well. Hopefully he'll be happier doing that and I will just chill with my little Monica and watch tv until sleep comes.

But I'm still pumped about my nose. Even if he is crabby with me for whatever reason. :)

Too Cool For School.

Ohhhh; classes start in the AM tomorrow. After a month and a half off I am not ready to go back at all. Especially since my scholarship requirments changed and raised my gpa and I anticipate the semester to be difficult. I'm not ready for the stress yet. Or the waking up early to be at school by 8:45.

Yuck.

Homeless.

It's been a year since I left my mom's and came to stay with my aunt and uncle. I was only supposed to be here 4 months and then move to Brunswick with my father. However, a few weeks before I was supposed to leave my dad called me and told me he thought it would be better if I stayed here in Parma. And then my sister and my stepsister moved back in at my dad's. And I ended up staying here way longer than expected.

I feel like such a burden or inconvenience. I've offered to pay some rent but they won't let me. And their marriage is very rocky and my aunt was laid off of work and is currently working a job she hates. And my uncle works two jobs and never sleeps. I feel terrible being here. And I feel like I have nowhere else to go. Hence the reason I am moving to my own apartment this summer.

When my dad found out about it, all he did was put me down. "You'll be evicted. You will starve. You will spend all your savings. This is the dumbest thing you could do." But not once did he offer me a place to stay. Not once has he ever helped me to pay for anything. So what else am I supposed to do? I literally have nowhere else to go. And I can't stay here forever and bother my aunt and uncle. It isn't fair. So I'm trying to do the right thing and am just being put down for it.

I feel like I don't belong anywhere. Like I'm homeless. And it sucks.